I love taking walks in Vegas.

Luckily everything was fixed but it was a travesty when it happened.

So I am thinking about attending Pod Camp AZ this year. It seems like fun and definitely something that I would be into. I love social media and I’m getting more into video blogging and stuff of that sort. Of course you can attend for free so thats always a plus. Tempe, AZ is pretty close I could probably just drive. Too bad most of my friends are somewhat technologically challenged and probably wouldn’t enjoy it. So if I decide to go I will probably go by myself.

I can’t wait to visit San Fransisco again.

Some people where there emotions on their sleeve. I’m just not one of those people. I think writing in this blog is probably the closest I’ve ever gotten to letting people truly know how I feel. I hold back what I feel because I don’t like feeling vulnerable.

At the same time all I’m doing is bottling my emotions until the pain is almost unbearable. My mind goes into panic mode. I can’t sleep. I can barely eat. I feel like I’m constantly going to be sick. And I want to cry so bad just to let it out but no matter how hard I try the tears just won’t come.

This is a horrible self-destructive pattern that I repeat. I believe that this pattern has made me a selfish, vindictive, arrogant, crude and cold person. And you have to know there is something wrong when you’ve been called a ‘heartless bitch’ more than once. I don’t even know myself anymore.

It hurts and the pain is insufferable.